Deutschlish or Germlish?

Germans say Deutschlish. I say Germlish.


I really do love my German class. I am learning a lot, the women are really nice and we laugh a lot. It's pretty much a requirement to be able to laugh at yourself when learning a new language. Lots of mistakes will be made and often, it's a really funny mistake. Like saying GAY instead of Humid. I've done that one before. Gay = Schwul. Humid=Schwül. See what I mean? Or that you want to cut your head instead of your hair. Things like this.

Who remembers trying to explain Varci's ankle surgery to Marriett in Spanish? It was an arduous task and I think she was a little confused after we told her that a doctor was going to take a knife and cut into varci's leg. Since we didn't know/remember the word for surgery or ankle, it became a little difficult. I feel like I'm doing the same thing here. I go around all the words I don't know which makes for really weird German. I always say, "Entschuldigung, ich bin eine Amerikanerin und mein Deutsch ist ein bisscen verunkt." = Sorry, I'm an American and my German is a little weird. It's also a very oddly worded sentence. So, most people just laugh and talk slower or easier to me. Which is awesome! I feel like I'm really starting to get it here and be able to have conversations. I just started to be able to have phone conversations. It's awesome. Now, I don't always have to go in person to an office and play charades with them. Whew.

So, this week in class, we learned the Passive form. It's when it doesn't matter who does the action just as long as it's happening. The only way I understood this was when our Spanish teacher, Isa, said that rich people on soap operas often have their butlers speak in this way.

"Dinner is now served" and "The mink coat is being cleaned."

From what I understand, in German, it is always used as something that is either happening now or in the past. "The car was washed". z.B. (zum Bispiel - for example) "The boobs were adjusted".

We've been told that this is a more sophisticated form of speech that we must learn. All recipes, manuals and soap operas talk in this speak. So, here goes. Got a test on Monday.

Today, the 60 year old Afghan woman from Kabul, *(obviously she looks like this...just add a few years...) said that her daughter told her that she might be better off in the new class that just started for beginners because she didn't understand the homework. She's a rad old with no filter, but no nasty intentions either. She just says what she wants. It's pretty funny. She told the teacher once that she didn't do the homework because she's "faul" / lazy. HAHAHA! We were rolling and the teacher appreciated her honesty. Oh well. Mosanna has lived in Deutschland for 20 years and she speaks well, but not perfect German. She knows way more than most of the people in the class. We have a few women that have lived in Germany for a long time, but are taking classes now. Like, another woman from Baghdad. She's lived in Germany for the last 20 years, too. She's super nice and brought in her young Russian neighbor into our class. And another lady from Turkey. She also talks the most in class and speaks German really well, but definitely has her own ideas. She's hilarious and a clean freak (KP, I'm thinking of you every time she says something about cleaning). She always tells us how much she hates her mother-in-law, too. She hasn't talked to her in 15 years. Now, that is dedication. And my favorite old lady in the class is also the oldest, Hariya, from Turkey. She's had a really hard life. Raised in the country. Married off at 13. Only went to school until she was 10. Then, had to live with her husband's family on their farm where they treated her like shit and used her like a house slave, while her husband left to move to Germany and took another wife. She finally moved here after the wive (S) died, but, she's also quickest to smile and give someone a compliment. She's so sweet. They've all raised their kids here and watched them struggle with being 1st generation in Deutschland. Just like in the States, it's hard for immigrants here to figure out where they fit in. I mean, the US is much more integrated and we have a history of being a country of immigrants,but we still struggle with this as a culture, too.

So, today to practice using the passivform, we got into groups and wrote down a recipe we knew. I was with the lady sitting next to me, Grace, a 40-something woman from Nigeria, who studied to be a chef, but it doesn't transfer here. So, we made up a recipe for Spaghetti Bolognese. She worked in kitchens the last 6 years, but gave up now and wants to do something different, but doesn't know what. She said that the restaurant industry is very different here because you can't work your way up with experience or ambition. Everything is regulated by how far you went in school. I'm finding that that is true with all professions here. **Tangent: I mean....real life example. I applied to some international shipping firm to be their "Document Manager". Here's the link to the actual job. It was a fancy title for a paper pusher. In the advertisement, it said that I had to have a degree in Engineering, experience in the shipping business and perfect English. So, I figured one out of the 75 qualifications would do. The job description was to file, scan, copy and mail or email things. So, doesn't require any kind of skills other than being literate and computer literate. So, I applied and attached my recommendations from Marty and Alec. I actually got a response, which I was surprise about. They said that although my resume was very interesting that they didn't think it was the right fit. haha.

Hoch Deutsch = High German. What all Germans have learned in school as opposed to the regional (street) German that most people know in conjunction with Hoch Deutsch. Like in Bavaria/Bayern (where they wear Lederhosen ALL the time and roll their R's and drink lots of beer), they speak a totally different kind of German than in any other region. There are 16 regions. Like the US, everyone likes to make fun of the other states as either backwards and conservative or hippie liberals. It's all the same.

Anyway, getting ready to go to the gym now. Woohoo.......(with a diminuendo)